As Valentine’s Day weekend comes to an end, we are excited to share our first interview of the February love series with the beautiful Christa Nutor. At age 24, Christa has learned to live life to the fullest while balancing a job in corporate America, maintaining a growing social media presence with her blog, and traveling – all while keeping her faith strong. She currently resides in Portland Oregon but is from Columbus, Ohio with native roots in Ghana. With this being the month of love we wanted Christa to share her faith journey with us as someone who is currently not in a relationship or dating but is indeed living her best life and going after her wildest dreams. This is what she had to say:
Journey of faith
My faith journey as a single is reflective of my faith journey through life. We hear all the time that God is love and my journey has been striving to look more like him every day. While I’m single, I’ve been striving to become more and more like love and to embody that. I take it on as a challenge every-day to receive and give love to those around me more. At the end of the day I want to be known as a person who both lived and loved life well. If that’s the only impact I have in the world that’s fine. 1 Corinthians 13 is a famous passage we hear a lot at people’s weddings. But even as a single we should hold on to that too because It’s not only for married people. I think we should all have that willingness to be more patient, more kind, less jealous, less proud, less self- seeking, (that’s a big one as a single person) more honoring to ourselves and those around us and basically the entire list in the passage. That’s what I strive to do in my faith journey.
What do you think is the most challenging thing you face being single at 24?
Growing up in church culture its very much a thing to elevate marriage and dating on a pedestal. And although it’s probably very well meaning it can be kind of toxic. As a single person growing up in the church that is something I’ve had to do a lot of heart work on and talk to people with a different mindset.
Marriage is always something I’ve wanted but I also know for me there’s a lot more I need to do before I get there , and when its right it will be right. If I seek out God and lean into my purpose that is me fulfilling his will and the person for me will be doing the same thing. Eventually, our paths will cross. Does it mean it will be easy? No. especially being in my mid 20s a lot of my friends are married, engaged, and having babies which is crazy because I’m actually very young (laughs) and I don’t understand what’s happening but it’s happening (laughs) and so yeah- its grounding myself and understanding that everyone has their own journey. Celebrating that for them and knowing my journey is what’s right for me. That’s what I hold onto and it makes it easier.
Your story doesn’t end or begin with a relationship. People think the happily ever after is the end of the book. But I don’t think that’s how it works. Let’s remember, Jesus walked this earth as a single person and some of the greatest people in the Bible did too.
That’s so good. Anything else you want to add about why we put so much value in relationships and dating? I think you raise some good points.
I think it can be easy to find our identity in someone else. We search for it in other humans when humans fail us daily. Like, we are so imperfect. I’d much rather put my identity in God who hasn’t failed me or will never fail me. We all have our individual purposes and God has called each of us to individual things. This makes me think of the “The Wait” by Meagan Good and Devon Franklin. They mention in the book something about being purpose partners. They both have purposes and together they partner and build each other up. I think in a relationship we’re supposed to both have purposes, come together, and it becomes something bigger because God is at the center vs trying to find our purpose or identity in each other.
What advice do you have for someone struggling to find their identity?
Depends on the stage of life they are in. If someone’s in a dating relationship and they seem to find themselves in that situation, maybe that means take a step back or going on a retreat with people who know you well. For me that would be my sister and close college friends – people who can call me back to who I am because they know me well. Something like that would be a good “come to Jesus” moment lol.
I like the practicality of that. A lot of times as Christians we say you have to find your identity in Christ but how do we do that? Its always good to have some practical steps to find your way back to God.
Exactly. We should go to the word first but also recognize God puts people in our lives for reasons. Community is how Jesus did life on earth and that’s how we are meant to do life on earth too.
Yes! I love it. My next question is about productivity. What have you been able to accomplish as someone who isn’t dating or married? Can you talk about the importance of making this season of your life the most meaningful?
I think I’ve been able to accomplish and gain a massive amount of self-awareness. The more time I spend with me the more I’m able to grow and understand who it is I want to be. Same with community- the more I spend time with others I learn how much I need them in my own journey. Now, don’t get me wrong. I very much look forward to being in a relationship, but I am enjoying the season that I am in.
I am a natural busy body which you probably can tell. I need to always be doing something. Climbing the corporate ladder is what I love to do. I love to write and share my heart via social media. Whether I’m single or not, those are the things I plan to accomplish. I don’t think my productivity is tied to my singleness.
Wow. That’s a good point.
It goes back to that purpose partner thing. When I’m no longer single I will still be doing what I’m doing now but with someone by my side who will support me. I’m very much aware that things do change but my heart and how I operate shouldn’t.
Yeah, if I felt like I had to give up my passions just because I’m in a relationship I would need to reevaluate that. Our partners should complete us, not make us give up the very thing we are created to do. But I know some people struggle with this, so what are some practical steps or things you would share with someone who feels challenged with being productive while they are single?
If someone desires a relationship, we used to put them in a category of “waiting” which is that whole idea of putting marriage on a pedestal. But if we’re going to use that lingo we need to know that “waiting” is not a passive thing. It’s not just chillin’. If we’re going to think of ourselves as waiting we need to think about waiting tables, as serving actively with purpose in mind. That’s how I try to think about it because I’m not the type of girl whose just going to sit and wait around because I think something else is coming.
Right! I saw you went to Coachella last year, attended networking events, and tons of socials.
Yes! That’s what I’ve been doing and how I’ve chosen to live my life right now and I absolutely love it. Like I said, I’m passionate about traveling, the business world, and that’s everything I’ve been able to do over the past few years like going to Coachella and blogging. I’m just striving to be the best version of myself and live life to the fullest.
That’s so good, we hear that a lot but I think what you just described is what it means to live your life to the fullest. Its doing things you love and things that bring you joy.
Exactly, that’s what it means, and I think everyone just finds it for themselves, but it is living your life in a way that brings you joy and makes you feel that everyday gets better.
Okay I have just two more questions. Can you tell us a little bit about your blog TheCurvyChristian.org and what inspired the name?
So, I started my blog about 3 years ago, right after I had graduated from college. For me, I get ideas and if it doesn’t go away I know its something I’m supposed to do. I used to use Facebook and would write these long rants and I noticed how it made me feel to put things into writing, It made things a lot more clear but it also seemed to be resonating with a lot of people. The things I was finding was how the world was not seeing the need for the church but also the church not opening its eyes to see what the world had to offer. And I felt I was in a place to be a bridge between the two. So after I graduated that’s how The Curvy Christian began.
Life’s curvy is pretty much what I say and I’m curvy too so lets figure it out together. From there its evolved and right now I’ve been focusing more on social media- specifically Instagram. I’ve been writing long forms, sharing my views on life and how others can live their life to the fullest as well. Im working on a few new things and I’m just excited for whats to come.
That’s awesome. I can’t wait to see what’s next cause I love everything you have to say and your Instagram is definitely poppin’!
Before we wrap up this interview, can you tell us what is on Christa’s reading list and what books would you recommend to anyone single, dating, or just trying to better themselves?
Currently, I’m reading “Becoming” by Michelle Obama – a great inspirational book for successful women no matter the stage of life your in. I would recommend “Today I Affirm” by Alex Elle – a self-care workbook. (You should also check her out on IG) and “The Road Back to You” by Suzanne Stabile and Ian Chron – a great start for the enneagram personality test that I highly recommend everyone take.
End of Interview.
You can follow Christa on Instagram @TheCurvyChrista and visit her blog at TheCurvyChristian.org.
Written by Ja’La Wourman. IG, Twitter @jalajwourman.